Lift problems.

So yesterday, 3 of my colleagues, strike it, friends, and I were going down the lift, to basement 2 from floor 8. Just us. Nobody else. We were laughing loudly, screaming like hooligans. Freedom eh? Had there been somebody else? Wouldn’t have been the same would it? So I was like, ‘maybe I should write a post on elevators’. And so, I am going to. Why? Atleast I should listen to myself *smh*. 
Mornings are lazy, no doubt, is there? Walking from the parking to the lift is one long trip, dragging yourself, cursing at every step. Every step forward is a step closer to work.
And how do we look in the mornings? Like poop. No kaajal on, hair not combed at all, and a straight face, only proof of you being civilised, is the clothing( don’t blame me. No policies say you have to look presentable in the parking lot. Face can be fixed at the washroom later. Aye?)
So I let the scanning guy scan my bag and walked towards the elevators, mine being in the other end, it is quite a walk again. Yay there’s this one lift that’s come but hey it is leaving, everyone’s gotten in, I am still at the door to the basement.

run? Nope. Butter finger, butter toes, everything buttery!

Or should I just hit the button on every other lift till i reach  mine? It works. 

*hit* *hit *hit* and when I am one lift away is when it strikes me there will be people around and the one that enters last always gets the attention, a complete head to toe analysis. *screamsinthehead*

The lift is still open. I just stand outside not hitting on the buttons anymore. *please go. Please don’t peep out.  I am guilty already* aaaaand gone!
I wait for the lift, praying nobody walks into me till I get into the lift and vanish. 

*floor minus two* says the voice in the lift.
I happily hop in because I am the only one *fistbumpboom* 
Now what? Just what do you do in the lift? If you have your earphones on, you can play loud music and pretend to be drowned in music while with every passing second you are eyeing everybody curiously to see who’s looking at you. But no earphones on either. Sigh.
So the lift stops at floor zero and a bunch of people walk in. More people and many many more. Staaaaaaaap. Just staap. The entire Sparta is in, now!
All you can do afterwards is only ‘think’.
Why do I have to be squeezed in between that fellow’s laptopbag and the wall? Just why?

Should I stop breathing? Will he find my hot breath annoying? Let me just hold in for a second.

Nooo. Nooooo. Can’t  *breathes out slowly*.
Hi. You there. You might need some deodrant. It is right inside my bag, feel free to use it. No? Okay.
Pretty Girl, why you looking at me? Give me 10 minutes, I will turn pretty too. Just needs some fixing. Okay now I am sure I look like a fully ripened tomato. Stop. Look away *coughs*
Yo bro. Nice song you have on! And I bet you have no clue what song’s playing. Been there. Done that. *high five*
Hahaha. You two are hilarious. So you fought with your sister and what happened next? She did not make dosas for you? That’s evil. Shit. Why you looking at me? O.o have I been staring at you all this while. Shiyaaaaaaattt. *looks away immediately*
I will probably just take my phone and scroll through the feed . Network issues, who cares just scroll. Still scrolling. Okay now who’s it peeping into my  phone ? Whaaaaai. *Shoves phone back into the bag*
Yaayyyy people are getting out. But damn now I don’t have the huge guy to hide me from the rest of the Spartans. Wait, how did I come to the centre? How.
I will just casually look at my ID card maybe till I reach my floor. No. All of you are not supposed to look at my Id card. Only I CAN LOOK.  ONLY ME. UGH. * turns the Id and rubs face casually*
How come I don’t know a single soul on the lift today? Mm? Sadness. How will the work volume be? Am I late or will I have time to go fix my hair and face? No. Strike that. Fixing is happening come what may! Can’t walk to the cubicle looking like this, or maybe can I? No I’ve done the ‘go natural’ look before, and it din quite work well. Damn.
Holy shit. How long have I been thinking? How do I look now? How did I look when I was thinking? Did I makw the weird *upper lip curling in, bunny teeth out’ mouth? Not that I care about what they think of me, still! Damn.
Oh here we are. Floor 7. Almost there. Yaaaaaaaaaaayyy. It’s floor 8 .come on put up your ‘yo I am too cool bruh’ face on! Yes. Now dont keep staring at the number display for too long, might sprain your neck.
‘Eighth floor’ I am hooooooome. Now all I have to do is, walk out gracefully, not trip over or skid. Slowly. Gracefully and out.
Yessssss! *lets out a huge sighhhh*
I did it.

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